November 4, 2009

I’m ending this blog.

I’ve said some things here that hurt the one person in the world who matters the most to me and I can’t have that.  For the sake of my marriage and the best husband in the world, I’m done writing publicly about my grief, losses and failures.

I will leave the blog up so that you can contact me via email if you don’t have my personal address.  I will also stay in touch by reading the posts on your blogs. 

Thanks to all the wonderful people who have read, commented, cried, sympathized, empathized and in general, been an amazing support system.

And finally, if you are my people, I hope you find peace and happiness.

All my love,


25 Responses to “Goodbye”

  1. Kelly Says:

    This makes me so sad, M, but I know that you need to do what is right for you, for your husband, and for your marriage. I will definitely keep in touch with you, and you know how to reach me if you need to talk. Hang in there. I still believe that it’s going to get better for you. I really do.

  2. Malou's Mama Says:

    Thank you for always being so honest and making me, and others mamas I’m sure, feel less alone. Best of luck to you and your hubby in the future. I’ll be thinking of you and wishing the best. Take care.

  3. Melissa Says:

    Thank you for sharing some of your journey with all of us. Best of luck! Will keep you and your husband in my prayers. Take care 🙂

  4. Erin Says:

    I’m sorry to see you go but I understand why. I think about you often and am anxious for life to smile on you.

  5. Marilyn Litt Says:

    I hope he understands that writing has been a way up for you out of the darkness. If you self-censored, it wouldn’t be worth the trouble. You have been driven to write and you were getting better for both of you. Along the way you helped others learn they were not alone. You have to have a space where you can say (or write) what you feel. All the best.

  6. panamahat Says:

    I’m sorry to see you leave the blog world. I hope you can find an outlet for your feelings that will replace this writing. Those feelings will still be there, even if you are not writing publicly about them, and I think it is healthy for you to be able to get them out.

    Take care of you.

  7. brown-eyed-girl Says:

    I am so sorry for all that you’ve been going through. I hope you are able to find another way to work through your feelings. Take care, we’ll all miss you here.

  8. Michele Says:

    Oh Martha… I am so sorry. I hope that things work out so that you can express yourself in another way.

  9. Rebekah Says:

    Take care and I wish you the best!

  10. Christy W Says:

    I’m so sorry to hear this. I know you never meant to hurt anyone. It’s so hard to be so, so honest-which is sometimes what it takes to get through this pain and loss. Your blog has helped me through so much-yours was one of the very first ones I found right after I lost the twins and you helped me to understand that I was not alone. It helped me more than I can ever express.
    Thank you and you will be missed 🙂 Please keep in touch somehow.

  11. KB Says:

    Martha, I’m so sorry about this. Please stay in touch somehow.

  12. iamstacey Says:

    You’ll be very missed. Do what’s best for you and your marriage. Thank you so much for all your honesty. I do hope someday you’ll be back to share with us again.

  13. Karla Says:

    Thank you for having the courage to put this up publicly to begin with, Martha. I’m sure you will still journal (or like my sister does, blog without publishing) or find some other outlet because it is important to share what you’re feeling. I know you have the very best intentions and I’m sorry anyone was hurt in the process. I will definitely keep in touch by e-mail and please let me know if you ever need anything. I’m always thinking of you and wishing you love and healing.

  14. athena Says:


  15. stacey Says:

    I agree with what’s been said here, Martha. You are so courageous to have shared so much here on your blog. I’ve appreciated your honesty about such a horrible situation. I will miss your posts, and I will keep you in my prayers.

  16. Although I understand, I am sad to see you go … Know that I will be keeping you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers.

  17. Jaded Says:

    I read this shortly after you posted this. Not to be selfish, but I was so bummed. But if you have in someway hurt (as you say) your husband this is the right move. I am really going to miss reading about your progress…you were one of the few bloggers that really told it how it is, one of the few that i really grew to care for.

    i am going to miss you, please check in on me from time to time.

    many hugs, love and light to you my friend,


  18. Angie Says:

    Hi, Martha,
    You won my first giveaway–the mizuko jizo painting. But I didn’t have an email for you, so send me an email with your address. With much love, Angie

  19. klboone212 Says:

    I’m sorry your ending your blog, but I hope that you find peace on your journey. Where ever life takes you, know i’ll be praying for you and your family.

    Kara B. (formerly

  20. Malou's Mama Says:

    Just in case you ever check in, just wanted you to know I am thinking about you and your precious boys this holiday season. I think about you often and am hoping for the best for you.

  21. Danielle Says:


    I don’t know you but have just spent hours reading through your blog archives and would really, really like to talk to you. I tried finding an email contact but to no avail. Please write me as soon as you have a moment:


  22. Shelly Says:

    I don’t know what to say other than thank you. My baby died almost 4 months ago. She was born with trisomy 18 (which we didn’t know about) and lived 2 1/2 days. So much of the time I feel so alone in my grief. Reading your words was like reading many of my thoughts I’m too afraid to share.

  23. Jen Says:


    You commented on my post at glow in the woods. Thank you for your help and I would like to talk with you more if you are up to it.

  24. bushkarogfa Says:

    I hope you are still around this site, so I can speak with you. My computer was stolen and I have been off line since early last Fall. I would like to know how you are doing. I hope to hear from you soon.

  25. ZM Says:

    I am very sorry for the pain you have suffered. I just wanted to say thank you. Your words have helped my understand. You have made a difference in my life, and well I just wanted to know that.

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