I Hate the Hospital

December 30, 2008

Hospitals used to never bother me.  Now UNC Hospital is about my least favorite place on the planet and if it wasn’t so convenient to work, I would stop going there (plus I like Dr. T).  I cry from the minute I exit 15/501 to turn onto the campus to the minute I turn back on 15/501 to get back to the office.  My whole day is ruined from that point on and all I can think about is my beans – all that I have lost in 2008.  This is where they told me that there was something wrong with Baby A and we had to go to Philly right away.*  It’s where they told me Baby B had no heartbeat.  I’ve had my blood drawn every week for the last eight weeks – painfully, I might add.  Is it any wonder that I hate this place?  Every time I pull into the parking lot, I remember that sick feeling I had in my stomach that I knew Baby B was dead but keep telling hubby, “I’m totally overreacting – I will buy you lunch in a couple of hours since you missed karate.”  I look at the elevators and think, “will I ever have a happy memory of this place?  Ever?”

Dr. T mentioned a reproductive endocrinologist.  He’s not sure if she will be able to help us but in his words, “a second set of eyes can’t hurt.”  I’m really interest to see what, if anything, this doctor can do with someone who gets pregnant but just doesn’t stay that way.  I’ve been pregnant 4 times in the last year and have only the stretch marks on my boobs to show for it so at this point, I am willing to try anything that might help me in my New Year’s Resolution – NO MORE DEAD BABIES!

Of course, that means more frequent trips to the place.  Woo hoo, I’m so thrilled.

*Running a very close second is Children’s Hospital of Philly where Baby A died.

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