Universal Hopelessness

November 3, 2008

So this is hopelessness.  This is what is feels like no to have any hope left.  I know I should test to see if I am pregnant but I just can’t.  I know I promised to be positive but I can’t.  I don’t have it in me.  Being positive got me nowhere in the car to Pennsylvania.  I bargained and pleaded with the universe to keep them safe.  I said I had hope.  The universe took Baby A.  I bargained and pleaded with the universe that Baby A was gone, leave me Baby B.  I had hope.  The universe took Baby B.

So why should I have hope now?  Is the universe going to give me a new baby?  The universe has proven that it hates me.

Hubby wants me to test in the morning. 

Maybe the universe likes him better.

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3 Responses to “Universal Hopelessness”


  1. good luck 🙂 i hope it comes out positive.

  2. hisaak Says:

    Thinking about you … I know that this road is extremely tough. Hope is hard to come by in our home right now as well. I will be sending wishes for a positive your way 🙂

  3. sunbonnetsue Says:

    I am sending you positive energy in hopes you get the results that you want. Best of luck!


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