B-day Fairy, Please Bring Me 1 Slightly Used Fertility God

August 26, 2008

So we are headed out of town this weekend for my birthday.  We had planned to hit the beach and camp with the dogs (one of two beaches left in NC where dogs are allowed anywhere on the beach – wouldn’t want to upset the tourists now would we? I have a love/hate but mostly hate relationship with tourists).  Although apparently the last remnants of Hurricane Fay is finally going to bring rain to the drought parched areas of North Carolina so it looks like we will be camping in the rain…I predict us coming home early on Monday….like maybe Sunday….

The rain is not surprising.  My birthdays are usually not exciting events.  I am perfectly happy spending it with my hubby and dogs, just hanging out but we always plan to do something fun – hell, it’s almost always a 3-day weekend – and something always happens.  Nope, not being over dramatic here.  Something always happens.  Last year, we had just moved and literally had $10 to our name.  Year before that, my mother insisted on coming to visit (we will discuss my relationship with her later) and then, when I wanted to go to the Aquarium said, “no, you two go ahead, I will just stay here…sigh.”  So of course I had to BEG her to join us at the Aquarium for a good hour.  At that point, who the hell wants to see fish anymore.  My hubby even got fired on my birthday on year….nice.

This also happens to be about the time that I am supposed to (but hoping not to) get my monthly visit from Aunt Flo.  I can assure you that if AF arrives while we are camping on the beach, we are packing up and heading to the nearest Motel 6.  Also, if that’s the case, we are stopping at the swap meet in Raleigh on the way home to find a fertility God (slightly used is fine) and I am going to place it on top of the TV in our bedroom and it can stare at me and hubby with it’s beady little eyes and BRING ME A BABY DAMN IT.

Maybe I’m just whining because I am another year older…

Oh looky what Gretchen got me for my b-day!  Thanks Gretchen!

My B-day Present from Gretchen!

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5 Responses to “B-day Fairy, Please Bring Me 1 Slightly Used Fertility God”

  1. Angela Says:

    happy birthday!! enjoy your weekend 🙂 i love reading your stories – your sarcasm and humor totally make my day!

    (the above em addy should work – i checked the yahoo one but i never found out why stuff was bouncing back, and i didn’t even know until you said something. thanks!)

  2. Rebekah Says:

    I wonder if it’s something to do with Labor day! My b-day is Sept 2nd and I always dread them. We’re going to Savannah this year to get away so hopefully that’ll help my moodiness.

  3. whataboutmyeggs Says:

    Happy birthday!! I will be hoping for a very easy going birthday for you, and hopefully, there won’t be a Motel 6 in the future either. If you come across a fertility god buy one for me, and I’ll pay you back. You can send it 1234 Babyless Ave.
    Hopeless, TX. 😉 Thanks. Good luck

  4. Freda Says:

    Happy Birthday! Hope AF doesn’t come a knockin’. That picture is so gross, by the way!

  5. Maricel Says:

    Happy birthday! Who knows, should you get pregnant on your birthday, what a great birthday gift indeed. I liked the pic. Had a good laugh looking at it!


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